Not Ok: 50% is not a good match percentage

by Megan Harris

Because I love this blog so much I set up OkCupid on my smartphone so I could receive my messages instantly to my phone.

I get messages all the time, constantly, and update about people who live nearby and “want to meet me, now!”

And it is really a bunch of crap. It is like the guys/girls who live nearby me and “want to meet me, now!” are really the bottom of the pile kind of people. They think they’re juggalos, they talk about pot, they don’t talk about anything, their match scores are low or 0% and their enemy percentages are super high.

Now this is a pretty good sample of people who live close by me. But my okcupid also sends me messages to my phone sent by people who live farther away.

This morning I was awakened by a very forward and really gross message from some guy in Arizona.
The first thing I did was look at his match percentage and it was seriously 45%.
Now I’ve received way lower match messages. Which kind of blows my mind. I usually don’t even entertain a friendship with people who are under 60%. Because, lets be serious…I can read your profile and usually under 50%-ers have HORRIBLE profiles. And if I don’t like how you write, I probably won’t like you.

So this dude, seriously? Do you not have any better options? You have to (seriously) proposition someone for casual sex who lives in Ohio? And this is your first message? I realize that I am so totally awesome, but still…Arizona?

So here is why I am confused: I do not have casual sex listed as something I am “looking for,” (nor would I ever), your match percentage is so low it is almost disgusting, you don’t have a good profile – nothing is written at all – except that you are looking for “casual sex,” and…what is going on?

Alright I am trying to word this without seeming like a cynical asshole. It could be that this guy is just totally trying to become pals with me. That I will laugh at his message and we will become best online friends forever, or something. But I am pretty much 100% sure he is just looking for a chick to talk to online who will send him naked pictures of herself. Because that is the kind of person who is the total opposite of me and who would have a 45% match with me.

This reminds me of two years ago when I was in Erie, PA for a few days while my grandmother was being hospitalized. There was a guy who saw me in a bar getting lunch with my family. He saw me on OkC afterwards and decided to message me about it. His percentage was the lowest I’d ever seen 10%. And he was a total loser.

But he seriously stalked my profile and messaged me constantly. It was like he didn’t understand my lack of interest in my not responding. After about 30 messages, he started sending sad emoticons. Then he started waxing poetic about how “I shouldn’t just ignore his messages because we live so far away from each other.” His profile listed him as living in Buffalo, NY even though he saw me in Eire. Dude, we live like 5 hours away from each other, that is really the last reason for me to not talk to someone, I am not someone who would consider distance a deal breaker at all. It is your loserness that is deal breaking.

I actually almost felt guilty for a while. But then I stopped feeling guilty and started feeling awesome instead.